At 17, I arrived at the Kington airport in Jamaica. I remember feeling absolutely free for the first time in my life. I had all I needed in my life in my backpack, adrenalin pumping through my veins, and a rape whistle that my mother gave me tightly attached to my wrist. She said, "if you are in danger, blow the whistle!" You see, Kingston, Jamaica, at that time anyways, was not well known for its hospitality. In fact Kingston was labeled "The murder capital of the world"! Luckily for me, I had no serious problems, but it REALLY OPENED MY EYES! I got to see Bob Marley's house. I got to see the bullet marks in the wall from the assassination attempt he spoke of in the song "Ambush in the Night". I sat where he sat, and I got to see some of the injustice that he saw. It helped to formulate my views on the world. I was the target of racism myself for the first time in my life and I understood completely why some people there held a grudge. I saw poverty for the first time, I saw guns and violence, but I also saw the kindness and beauty of perfect strangers in the least expected places. I decided to stay longer as Jamaica intrigued me. I also met a Jamaican guy in Kingston and we started seeing each other, but because Kingston became too dangerous for us (he was physically attacked for dating a white woman), we moved to Ocho Rios, a lovely tourist town. I started my own little business making candles and hemp jewelry and I would walk around selling my goods from store to store and sometimes to the tourists who came off the cruise ships. Living in Jamaica was a treasured experience I'll never forget, but it was so difficult to live there due to the racism, poverty, hatred, jealousy and domestic abuse that was encircling me. I was endangering myself and my boyfriend by staying any longer. This is when I left Jamaica.... and I had no idea where to go next. I knew I couldn't live in Canada again because I wasn't finished trying to understand the world. My mother had moved to Sweden so I tried to stay there with her for a while while I figured things out.
Pengalaman di Jamaica
Waktu saya umur 17 tahun, saya pergi ke Jamaica sendiri. Saya Ingat waktu itu saya merasa merdeka total! Semuanya yang saya butuhkan ada di dalam ransel saya, dan di tangan saya terikat satu peluit dari Ibu saya. Ibu saya bilang, "Kalau kamu ketemu situasi yang berbahaya, bunyikan peluit ini!" Itu karena Kingston, Jamaica, waktu itu disebut "Ibu Kota Pembunuhan Sedunia". Untung saya tidak pernah ketemu masalah besar, tapi Jamaica sangat membuka mata saya. Saya bisa kunjungi rumah Bob Marley. Di rumahnya, sampai saat ini masih bisa lihat bekas peluruh dari serangan "Ambush in the Night". Saya coba melihat dunia lewat mata dia, dan baru bisa lihat dunia yang belum adil dan jauh berbeda dari negara saya. Saya lihat kemiskinan, pemuda yang pegang senjata, dan racism, tapi juga kesadaran dan kebaikan yang tak terbatas. Ketika di Kingston, saya ketemu seorang lelaki bernama Joseph. Tidak lama kemudian dia menjadi pacar saya. Saya masih mau mengeksplor Jamaica, tapi karena pacar saya sudah menjadi korban kejahatan (gara-gara jalan sama orang putih) kami pindah ke Ocho Rios. Saya bikin dan jual kalung dan lilin di jalan, dan juga jual ke toko-toko. Cukuplah untuk makan, tapi economy di Jamaica saat itu susah juga. Saya merasa saya bekerja paling keras seumur hidup waktu itu dan hanya menghasilkan uang cukup untuk makan dan membeli bahan lilin untuk berkarya lagi. Walau saya rasa bersyukur saya punya kesempatan tinggal disana, racism, kemiskinan, dan kekerasan membikin saya putus asa untuk tinggal disana. Pada saat itulah saya putuskan untuk pindah. Ibu saya sudah kerja di Swedia waktu itu jadi saya coba pergi ke sana dulu. Hanya satu hal yang saya tahu, saya tidak bisa lagi tinggal di Kanada karena dunia luas ini masih punya banyak pengalaman bagi saya yang belum saya jumpai.